October 23, 2012

The Love Labyrinth

"I kinda figured that out already. You don't need to be sorry.  The things I told you yesterday, I did it for me. I let it all out, so I wouldn't have to agonize on the "what ifs" anymore.  Funny thing is I'm the one who regretted it for saying a little bit too much, too soon. I guess it's not really meant to be.  So, this is it, good luck to both of us.  I sincerely wish you true happiness. Good bye, R**." 
- Karlie, 23Oct12, 0548H

It was a blur how I got home from the office. Throughout my journey, only these words lingered in my mind. I kept looking at my mobile phone and read through the last trail of our text exchanges. Then I stared blankly through the car window as these words bluntly pierced my already battered heart. I wish I was wearing a mascara, so my face would be marked by black tears. I bet that could have been more melodramatic!  These good-bye pleasantries have become a familiar landscape. In retrospect, I've dealt with it so many times, it started to erode my essence into a pit. What has become of me?

Countless of times I let myself plunged into a love labyrinth.  I was lost, trapped, tripped, wounded and dazed by its intricacies. Countless of times I said never again. Then eventually I would revoke it and end up muttering here I go again. What is left of me?

I have gotten used to it that every time I get another shot at love, I tend to self-destruct and kill it long before it even flourishes.  Why do I do that? ... Why do I do that?





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1 comments:

Louise Antonette | Mommy Practicality said...

hey you, we're seated next to each other yet I didn't have a clue. Hope you're ok, you know that you can tell me anything. Huuuugs!