"I kinda figured that out already. You don't need to be sorry. The things I told you yesterday, I did it for me. I let it all out, so I wouldn't have to agonize on the "what ifs" anymore. Funny thing is I'm the one who regretted it for saying a little bit too much, too soon. I guess it's not really meant to be. So, this is it, good luck to both of us. I sincerely wish you true happiness. Good bye, R**."
- Karlie, 23Oct12, 0548H
It was a blur how I got home from the office. Throughout my journey, only these words lingered in my mind. I kept looking at my mobile phone and read through the last trail of our text exchanges. Then I stared blankly through the car window as these words bluntly pierced my already battered heart. I wish I was wearing a mascara, so my face would be marked by black tears. I bet that could have been more melodramatic! These good-bye pleasantries have become a familiar landscape. In retrospect, I've dealt with it so many times, it started to erode my essence into a pit. What has become of me?
Countless of times I let myself plunged into a love labyrinth. I was lost, trapped, tripped, wounded and dazed by its intricacies. Countless of times I said never again. Then eventually I would revoke it and end up muttering here I go again. What is left of me?
I have gotten used to it that every time I get another shot at love, I tend to self-destruct and kill it long before it even flourishes. Why do I do that? ... Why do I do that?